Happy Friday! Today, I’m guest-blogging over at Southern Mama + Child about my decision to be a mom who works outside of the home.
You can check out my post here. I’m looking forward to hearing from you ladies—please leave me a comment if you’d like to!
Veronika, you are sure making the right choice. I don't have kids yet, but I am 100% sure I am going to be a working mom. You said something super important on your post about your husband being a 50/50 partner. I really don't understand all the fuss about working moms when nobody "judges" working dads. Women have to stop feeling guilty about working out of home. If their choice is to have a career, they have to focus on building a cooperative dynamics with their partner. As I said, I'm probably not going to have kids for a year or two, but the thought of people telling me I have to stay home (which happened to all of my friends) makes me really mad – especially because usually people think it's ok to tell you how to live your life when you have kids. On the other hand, I also feel bad for stay-at-home moms who are criticized or not appreciated by working moms (or their partners, who probably have NO idea of how hard it is). We have to respect each other's decisions, without judgement of any kind. Whatever works for you and your family, that's what's right. And that's why I loved your post!!! 😉
thanks so much for your comment…it's such a mix of emotions. Glad to know so many women relate 🙂
You are amazing! Thank you for sharing! I've been following your blog for over two years now, and just love to read about your life experience, makeup and shopping tips and seeing your beautiful photographs. Thank you for making an impact on my life. Best wishes to you and your family! Sincerely, Tamara
thank you Tamara 🙂
Great post. You are so correct that the decisions to work or not work and if you do work, what type of child care to use, are personal to each family and each come with pros and cons. The important thing is that we do what we can and what is best for our families and support each other. I have two small children, chose to continue working and use daycare and our family is happy. I cherish the weekends and there is no better feeling than in the afternoon, when I pick them up and they're in a group or art activity with their friends. And then they see me and come running to me with a big smile and outstretched hands. I also have many friends who work full-time in their homes and are wonderful at what they do. They also are working very hard, but I enjoyed reading your words as a happy mother who works outside of the home.
thank you Megan 🙂 there are so many ups and downs but one thing remains the same—I think we are all striving to do right for our families 🙂
I due back to work in November & dreading some days but other days I also feel like it's a good change too. The importance is finding a balance & yes having a husband who is supportive is a real bonus. Great read! On a side note I remember mentioning that I would love to send you one of my handmade bibs. Let me know if you're interested by sending me a private message.
thank you 🙂 yes please feel free to email me!
very good read, especially when i will be making this decission soon. thank you for sharing your story! un uk you can have up to 12 months of maternity leave, we are so lucky!
yes you are very lucky! I'm glad you liked the post!
Thank you for this post! As a fellow full-time working mom, I can relate almost word for word. It's really been on my heart lately. My son is now 11 months and turning into a little toddler. We're fortunate that my mother in law watches him in our home, but I still feel as if I'm missing so much. I always feel as if I have to defend myself for working, when it really isn't anyone else's business. Just last night I had a friend mention that she will be staying home to raise her own kids when she has them. She didn't mean it directed at me, but it still hurt. I'm not sure that I will work full time forever, but right now it is what is best for our family. Anyways, thank you again! There aren't many posts like this so it is very refreshing to read 🙂
I think any mother or soon-to-be mother who tells another mom that she's staying home because "she wants to raise her own kids" is coming from a place of fear and insecurity. Not only is that not an appropriate thing to say to another mother, it's an untrue statement.—we all raise our own kids, whether we work inside or outside of the home. Staying home doesn't make someone a better mother. It doesn't mean their children will "turn out better" or "be loved more." It just means that mom is home for more hours in the day, and that is a tough job. As I said in my post, I think that every mom has to realize she is trying her best and making choices she feels are best for her family. If I truly felt like staying home would be better for my family, that is what I would have chosen. I do have moments of uncertainty, but I see my child thriving and I love how her days are filled with so much fun and activity, especially since I am not there all day with her. I'm sorry you had to hear these comments from a friend. I have been shamed before too for sending my daughter to daycare at 14 weeks, and it never feels good, no matter how someone says it. The bottom line is that there are amazing, wonderful stay at home moms and amazing, wonderful working moms. Being a good mom comprises of so many things outside of how many hours a day you spend with your child.
Hi – I've been reading your blog for a while–stumbled on it when looking up how to use dry shampoo and then kept reading since you were a little further on in your pregnancy than I was. Just wanted to say I thought your post on being a mom and working full time outside of the house vs. staying at home was very well written. I enjoyed reading it. You address a lot of the things I'll have to consider when moving back to the U.S. with my family and deciding if I want to go back working outside of the home. Thanks for a good read!
Hi Rachel! Thank you so much for your comment 🙂 It is a tough decision because I think as women we want to do it all. But as long as you make a decision that you feel will bring you the most happiness, that's what matters. Not what anyone else thinks 🙂 good luck!