It was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made for myself and because I get a lot of questions and emails about the procedure and my experience, I thought I’d share it here.
Before I begin, I’ll address the inevitable—why would I share this so publicly? Well, the simple reason is that I have nothing to hide and I’m not embarrassed or ashamed of the fact that I’ve had plastic surgery. It’s quite the opposite actually, I’m proud of and happy with my decision. I know there’s a stigma associated with plastic surgery and part of the reason I like to share my experience is because I like to dispel the myth that only strippers, porn stars, women who hate themselves and unintelligent women who only care about how they look get plastic surgery.
Most people would never know I had the surgery unless they knew me before I had it. At 5’10, my 34D cup size (which looks more like a 34C on my frame) is so proportionate that sometimes I don’t even believe I have implants—they look like the breasts my body was supposed to have.
So, let’s rewind a little to a time I’ll call B.I.—“Before Implants.” Ever since I was in 7th grade or so, I noticed I wasn’t developing like the other girls. I was really tall and skinny and of course with that, came a very flat chest. I had always hoped that I would develop more in high school, but that just didn’t happen. In fact, my breasts never grew beyond 7th grade. They just stayed flat. Like completely flat. Like 34 AAA flat.
So, I did what every girl does. I wore padded bras, sometimes 2 at once if an outfit required it and I dealt with it. I was generally happy with my body and how I looked so I wasn’t too hard on myself—but I did always think about my breasts and wished that they were larger so my body looked a little more balanced.
I started thinking about breast augmentation in high school, but didn’t seriously consider getting the surgery until my last few years in college. I kept hearing that your breasts can grow into your 20s and I think I hoped that they would…but deep down I knew they wouldn’t. I’m not sure how I “knew” but I think the fact that going on the pill and gaining weight as I got older and my boobs staying the same size regardless was a pretty good indicator that my triple A’s weren’t going to magically bloom into B’s overnight.
I still remember the day like it was yesterday. My mom and I had just had lunch with family at an all-you-can-eat buffet and for some reason, I was feeling particularly passionate about my flat chest that day. On our drive home, I broke down, cried and told my mom that I really really wanted to seriously considering having the surgery done when I graduated from my postgraduate program. I don’t know why I cried, I guess I was just simultaneously happy that I was finally getting serious about it and that I would finally have the proportion to my body that I had always dreamed of.
She said she would take me on a consult—my mom is a nurse and one of the doctor’s that operates at her hospital is a very well known plastic surgeon. I went in for my consultation and of course I did a lot of research on my own. The day I booked my surgery was surreal. I couldn’t believe it was actually happening. A lot of women say they felt nervous the day of their surgery—but I felt excited and happy. Like I’d been waiting so many years to finally do this and it was finally happening.
So….
It’s hard to explain…especially to women who weren’t flat-chested, but I’ll try. When you think about the human body, men and women have differences (obviously). I truly felt that I was missing a part of me that made me a woman. Of course I was happy with myself overall and I felt beautiful because of the incredible people in my life who told me I was…but it was deeper than that. I always kind of felt that something was missing on my body because I had never developed breast tissue. I know a lot of women complain that they have small boobs—but I literally had none. No breast tissue whatsoever. My plastic surgeon even remarked during my consultation that I have some of the smallest breasts he had ever seen on someone of my size and that I was “underdeveloped.” I guess I just always wanted that feminine curve on my body and I wanted to feel proportionate and fill out my clothes. For me, it was never about attracting men (I did that just fine with my triple A’s) it was more about balancing my body. I have wide hips, and lacking curves on top made me feel very disproportionate.
So that’s the overall reason—wanting to fill out my clothes and bathing suits and wanting to feel more proportionate and balanced. It’s funny, because now that I’ve had my implants for nearly four years, I often think to myself that I feel more like “me” now than I ever did without them. A lot of people sneer at a woman putting a “foreign object” into her body—but for me, my implants feel like such a part of me that I can hardly remember what my body was like without them. They feel like the breasts I was meant to have.
What was the surgery like?
I was extremely fortunate to have a great surgeon (Dr. Sean Rice in Toronto, for those wondering). Not only did I have a very easy recovery, but my results are beautiful (and I don’t say this to be conceited, I truly mean this from a surgical perspective—he just did such a beautiful job).
The day of my surgery I met with Dr. Rice and he made marks on my chest with the black marker you see on all of those plastic surgery shows. Then, I was wheeled into the OR and I was laying on the operating room table getting my IV. I still remember the nurse from that day—as they gave me my anesthetic, I remember looking up at her and noticing that she had indigo blue mascara on. I commended on it and she told me it was Dior mascara from Sephora…and then I must have gone under because I don’t remember a thing after that.
Because my mom is a nurse at the hospital where I had my surgery, she was able to be in the post-op room that they don’t let most patient’s families into. When I woke up, she was right there. I was a bit foggy and I remember the nurse asking me if I was in pain. I felt a bit of almost like a burning sensation maybe so I said “yes” and she pushed a little morphine for me. Nice. I think we were in there for about 45 minutes to an hour and then I tried to sit up a few times. Eventually, I got into a wheelchair and we were leaving the post-op area. I had a suddenly strong urge to pee, so I told my mom and the nurse I had to pee and they wheeled me to the restroom. I remember standing up and trying to pee. It was a bit hard to sit up and down because I was still a bit woozy, shall we say, but I did it. Then, as I got out of the restroom I sat back down in the wheelchair and suddenly I just felt dizzy and nauseous and had a very dry feeling in my throat that made me almost not able to speak. I reached my arm out to a passing by nurse and begged for water. They brought me a Popsicle and all was well. Then, we got into my mom’s car and she drove me home.
The next few days I rested in bed propped up on a ton of pillows and moved around the house pretty normally. The day after my surgery, I went to the mall for about 3 hours. On the third day after, I washed and blow dried my own hair. The fifth day after my surgery, I drove. I kept my body moving throughout my recovery because it helped me get back to normal more quickly. Sure I could have laid in bed all day, but I truly believe that leads to a slower recovery. It’s like when you have a super hard workout and your muscles are sore—they just get more sore the second day—but, if you move around and do some cardio, they loosen up and feel so much better. I had no bruising and only a teeny bit of swelling.
So basically, I was fortunate to have a super-awesome recovery. I was never in pain. I would describe it more as a mild discomfort. The mornings were the only time you really feel sore (“morning boob” as they like to call it)—but the pain wasn’t worse than what you’d get from a super-tough workout. I was pleasantly surprised by the complete lack of pain. I was able to eat normally, see my friends, etc. The one thing that was more painful than the actual surgery was (TMI alert!) the constipation you get from the anesthetic. I’m pretty sure that was the most painful part of the process.
Do you ever worry people will judge you because you’ve had a breast augmentation?
Like I said above, most people who didn’t know me before the surgery would never know I had them done unless I told them. The main reason is because getting breast implants didn’t suddenly make me have the desire to dress like a stripper or porn star. Isn’t that amazing?! I was so worried that suddenly I’d want to dress like a stripper, but magically, that didn’t happen (I am totally hoping people are reading the sarcasm here).
Listen, I never wanted to dress with my boobs hanging out all over the place and with cleavage being the focal-point of my look. Some women get boob jobs and they completely change and start dressing really provocatively to “embrace” and draw attention to their new look. For me, it was never about that. I wanted to fill out my clothes, not overflow out of them. If someone were to judge me because I chose to have this surgery, they are not someone I would want to associate with. I think because I went with a proportionate size for my body and height, most people wouldn’t think much of it anyway. I’m always surprised when people say “really?!” if I tell them I have implants. It’s because they aren’t really detectable. In a bathing suit they might be a little more obvious, but in professional attire, you’d never know I had em’.
Do you have trouble fitting into clothes now?
Nope. Not ever. I went from a 34AAA cup to a 34D cup, but because I’m so tall, my 34Ds don’t look like a D cup on me (more like a C). If you’re 5’2 and get a D cup, you might not be able to fit into your XS shirts anymore, but I’ve never, ever had problems with finding clothes—they all fit even better now!
What kind of implants do you have?
Because I had a very narrow chest, my surgeon recommend High Profile implants. I’m happy I went with this because they have more projection that a normal implant which really makes them look perky and lovely. Basically, the implant itself it narrower but it project more outwards, allowing it to hold more fluid.
I have silicone gel implants by the company Allergan. I’m so happy I went with them over saline (nothing wrong with saline at all, I just liked the way the gels felt better.) My implants are 400cc’s each and I had them put in with a crease incision (an incision underneath each breast) with a placement under the muscle. I have scars, but they’re fine and I never even see em’ because I cant really see underneath my boob if I’m looking at myself straight-on.
Don’t only insecure people get implants?
I’m sure many women who get implants are insecure with themselves overall and think a boob job will make them happier or get them the attention they’re seeking. For me, it was never about that. Was I insecure about the size of my chest? Of course I was. But was I an insecure woman? Nope. Men and women always told me I was beautiful, I had boyfriends who were attracted to me and I was overall happy with how I looked. Like I said above, not all women who get plastic surgery hate themselves. I just wanted to improve one part of my body that could only be done with surgery, and I’ve never looked back. I no longer have to think about how I can’t buy a dress because I won’t fill it out. It’s wonderful. I think every woman has an insecurity or two—but I was never dominated by my insecurity.
Would you be happy if you had never gotten implants?
Of course! I’m a happy person and I’d be happy with or without my boobs. However, I do have to say I feel exponentially happier about my body now that I have them. I feel balanced. I keep going back to that word—but that’s the best way I can describe it—that things are as they should be.
Will you ever replace them or have them taken out?
I plan to eventually have them re-done when I am finished having children. I do not plan to have them removed unless it was medically necessary. I plan to breastfeed if I can. If I ever have them redone, I might go to 450 or 500 cc implants. I’m thrilled with my size—but, as most women who have gotten implants will say “I could have gone a teeny bit larger.” I don’t know if I actually would, but 50 to 100 cc’s is a few shot glasses full of fluid—not much at all.
How does your husband feel about your breast augmentation?
At the time I had the surgery done, I had been dating my (now) husband for about 6 months or so. He was always very supportive and told me that he would support me if the surgery would make me feel confident about my chest size. He was there for my after my surgery and has always had nothing but a positive outlook about it. He always says he loved me when he met me—without them, and he loves me just the same with them. He says as long as I’m happy, he’s happy. I’m a lucky gal.
How did friends and family react?
You know what’s amazing about plastic surgery? Most of the time, when the person wakes up from the surgery, they are still the same person they were before the surgery! I was shocked by it too, but really, you just wake up, and you’re the same person, but with silicone round thingies in your chest (once again, please read the sarcasm.) Sure, there are some ladies who get implants and suddenly think they are “all that” and like to flaunt them every chance they get and it changes their personality a bit because maybe for the first time ever they feel good about themselves…but I’d argue that for most women (who were happy with how the looked before the surgery) the only thing that changes is that they’re even happier and they don’t have to stuff their bra anymore. Woo hoo! Seriously though, I was very open with friends and family about my surgery, and I was still the same gal as before, just with bigger boobies, so no one reacted adversely. Come to think of it, maybe they thought it was awesome that I finally had boobies, too.
I’m considering having a breast augmentation—where do I start?
- Only consider getting consultations from a board certified plastic surgeon
- Go to www.justbreastimplants.com/forum to talk to other women who have had the surgery—lots of great advice on these forums and plastic surgeons answer questions there too!
- At your consult—pay attention to your surgeon’s bedside manner and go with the surgeon you feel most comfortable with—the one who took the time to answer your questions, address concerns, share their past work with you, make recommendations based on your unique measurements, etc…
I hope this post was informative and helpful. Remember, this was just my unique experience with the surgery and there are many out there. I feel very fortunate that I didn’t face any complications and that I had such a gentle, caring surgeon who gave me beautiful results.
If you have additional questions about my experience, please feel free to comment below or ask me anonymously on my formspring page.
xoxo,
Veronika.
PS—I know this entry is like beyond long—but I did want to share this little tidbit. Ever since I was in high school, I promised myself that I’d fill out my wedding dress on my wedding day. I’m happy to have fulfilled that promise.
What a great post. I enjoyed reading it. I'm sure it will be helpful to women who are considering the procedure. I think the important thing is you did it for yourself, not someone else. Also, you weren't banking on it to change your life or complete your mental or emotional state. If I remember correctly, breast aug has been happening for decades. It's been given a skewed introduction into mainstream (accessible to the masses) by twisted stories we've seen on tv. Y'know the ones, footage edited into heightened drama. Elective surgery is more common & normal than it's sometimes portrayed to be. I also think any elective surgery is very personal, so thanks for sharing your experience.
You look great, btw. Your doctor did a great job.
@gigi—- thanks for your comment, and you're exactly right—you have to go into it knowing that you won't change your life by doing it. It's all about having realistic expectations.
What's sad (and I see this a lot on the forums) is that a lot of women are never happy with their breasts and have to have more and more surgeries. A boob job won't give you perfect breasts, it will just give you a larger version of what you already have.
Honestly, I would never know you had implants based on your pictures! Your surgeon gave you a great, amazingly natural result.
Thanks for an interesting, informative post, because you're right, plastic surgery still has such a negative stigma attached to it.
Great post and I appreciate you sharing. I would never think about getting breast implants (I have too big of boobs!), but I was interested to read this post.
What a great post!! I love your wedding dress 🙂 My mom and I talk about this a lot and this answered a lot of questions 🙂
I agree that this was a great post. I really respect that you are so open about it. I am considering getting the surgery myself. I am 25 and recently engaged. I know my fiancée loves me just the way I am, but as you said this decision is not about him nor would it be for him.
The one question I have for you is how did you pay for them? I have a decent office job, but am also a nursing student so paying for them is pretty much my only obstacle.
Also, had you had any previous surgeries prior to the augmentation? I have never had any surgeries, which is another thing that sort of holds me back.
Again, thanks for the post and i love your blog.
@tina—I used some funds from my line of credit and then paid it off.
I had not had any other surgeries prior to my augmentation. I wasn't scared though…maybe because I have a lot of people in my family in the medical field so I've always felt comfortable with hospitals, doctors, etc…
good luck with making your decision 🙂
That's for sharing! I would have NEVER known you had a breast augmentation if you didn't say anything about it. I've been wanting to have plastic surgery for my nose – this post really helped me feel good about my decision.
@silvina—thanks 🙂 I'm happy I have a natural result for my figure. I think when it comes to implants, there's a fine line between subtle and obvious!
Good luck with your surgery. I know a few people who have had their noses done and they are very happy with their results.
Great post!!! Thanks for sharing!! The wedding pictures are amazing!!!
xoxo Olga
https://lapetiteolga.blogspot.com/
Thanks for posting this Veronika! You're right, it's nothing to be ashamed of, or hide, and it's good to be honest and discuss it.
@mikaela—thanks for your comment 🙂 I've always felt comfortable sharing this experience because I know I did it for the right reasons and I'm so happy with my decision.
Veronika, we have very similar stories & I'm very proud & happy with my decision as well. I had my breast augmentation in April 2007 & went from a 34AA to a 34C (I'm 5ft tall). I always had difficulties finding dresses that fit my thicker bottom & tiny top; everything had to get tailored. Well, I'm getting married in October & I am THRILLED with the way my wedding dress fits. I know dress shopping would've been very difficult & probably painful if I hadn't had the surgery… Thanks for sharing your experience!
https://reallyrenata.blogspot.com/
@nata— i'm glad you also had a positive experience with the surgery. I also had the best time wedding dress shopping because I was able to fill everything out and everything fit so wonderfully. I can definitely relate 🙂
you can't even tell you had anything done it looks like they came with your body which to me is a surgery = successful! The girls that get the inflated balloons in their chests look ridiculous! I'm a 32B-34A and I don't consider my self "Flat". I like that I can wear XS tee shirts. Every guy I have ever dated has said so long as there is something to grab then that's cool with them LOL . You looked Terrific on your wedding day!!
Thank you for posting this.
My little sister is 5'7" and a 38DDD, and she has been thinking about getting breast reduction because she doesn't feel comfortable "in her own skin" as she puts it. I love what a positive outlook you have on the entire science of plastic surgery. I will encourage her to read this blog post in the hopes that she feels better about her decision to have the surgery. Thank you.
Great post Veronika!! I've been wanting a boob…..shape change for a few years. The size is fine (don't want implants), I just want them shaped differently. I don't know what that's called, but I'm hesitant to spend the $$!
Thanks for sharing, it was such an interesting post! I also had an augmentation after having children (my boobs were perfect before breastfeeding, but really sad and tiny after)and I think it was the best decision I´ve ever made. It's nothing to be ashamed of, I´m really proud I did it!
@CMae–thanks for your comment. Every guy said that to me too—but unfortunately, I really didn't have anything to grab. LOL.
I remember we used to message each other about our upcoming surgeries on JBI 🙂 haha soo long ago! Awesome post, really explains everything well and makes it understandable for those who may not understand why some women choose implants. LOVE your wedding pics (and your blog!!) and glad you're still lovin' your result!
"Hockeybabe17" 😉
Your doctor did a great job! I remember you previously mentioning that you had them done and I was shocked because they just don't look "fake". They really are proportionate to your body so kudos picking a perfect fit! I am happy with my breast size now but I always tell my husband that if pregnancy/breastfeeding takes a toll on my girls….I'll just have them picked right back up haha!
@mary ann—I think changing the shape would be reconstructive surgery. I've talked to women before who had tuberous breasts and they've gotten implants to fix the shape and size issue all in one. Not sure if that's an option for you, but you could always get a consult to see what your options are.
@hockeybabe 17—Yes! I remember 🙂 so glad we can keep in touch via the blog. Thanks for commenting 🙂
@megan—I have a friend who had a breast reduction and she told me it was the best thing she did. She no longer had back problems and felt comfortable in her body. It's a more painful procedure than a breast augmentation, but I've never heard a woman who wasn't happy she did it!
@dee—glad you had a great experience 🙂 it's awesome not to have to think about your boobs anymore and just be happy with em'!
wow ur implants look extremely natural , i had noo idea- thanks for sharing!!!
I have a similar story as you! I, however, went to a C from an A (good for my 5'5" frame) for a subtle change. I wanted to look like myself, but how I always wanted to look. I did this a month and a half before my wedding!!! HAHA! My surgeon was amazing (one of the only females in the area specializing in BA) and assured me I would be perfect by my wedding. I was! Recovery was easy! Just uncomfortable at times, but it was during the summer when I was off of work (yay to being a teacher) so I had plenty of time to massage them and really take care of them in time for the wedding. I think yours look great – very perfect for your body. I do not regret this decision at all!!!!! -Meg @ O. is Me
Thanks for sharing! I'd love to see a "before and after" photo comparison. I think you look so natural and agree with everyone else that I would never have guessed you had implants without being told.
Good post and GOOD for you! Thanks for sharing. Like others said, I never would've guessed from your pictures on the blog that you have had an augmentation…another indication that it's all natural-looking. I think it's great that you shared the whole process and what you went through mentally and physically so that others can understand it better. As always, thanks for being real! 😉 Erica
wow!! your doctor did an amazing job. super natural and they really fit your body. love it and LOOOOVEEE your beautiful wedding dress!!!
Perfectly worded! Thank you so much for sharing–especially for those of us considering having it done and have been wanting some clarification and a "real life" story. Gorgeous! Love this post!
Great post! I am new to reading your blog (since around Oct) and I have to say that I am addicted! I am a fellow Texan (Dallas area) and love to read your posts on everything from fashion to makeup to house decorating. 😉
I have to say reading this post took me back down memory lane to my pre-augmentation days. Growing up I felt the exact same way. I am 5'11" and curvy and even at my heaviest my double A boobs, were just that, still a double A. I had hoped and hoped they would grow but of course they didn't. I felt out of proportion, I didn't feel womanly and I was so self conscious about my body. So, In 1997 I decided to give myself the chest I felt I should have been born with. I didn't do it for anyone but myself and like you commented, most people don't even know I have implants unless I tell them. My surgeon did a beautiful job. My 34Ds look natural and fit my body so well. It was the best decision I ever made for myself, I now feel complete. Thank you for sharing your story and bringing awareness to the fact that having plastic surgery isn't always about "looking or dressing like a stripper" 😉
JamiT
Great post! I am new to reading your blog (since around Oct) and I have to say that I am addicted! I am a fellow Texan (Dallas area) and love to read your posts on everything from fashion to makeup to house decorating. 😉
I have to say reading this post took me back down memory lane to my pre-augmentation days. Growing up I felt the exact same way. I am 5'11" and curvy and even at my heaviest my double A boobs, were just that, still a double A. I had hoped and hoped they would grow but of course they didn't. I felt out of proportion, I didn't feel womanly and I was so self conscious about my body. So, In 1997 I decided to give myself the chest I felt I should have been born with. I didn't do it for anyone but myself and like you commented, most people don't even know I have implants unless I tell them. My surgeon did a beautiful job. My 34Ds look natural and fit my body so well. It was the best decision I ever made for myself, I now feel complete. Thank you for sharing your story and bringing awareness to the fact that having plastic surgery isn't always about "looking or dressing like a stripper" 😉 — jamiT
great story! i don't think you can breastfeed after breast augmentation surgery though…
Thanks for sharing this! I hope this helps, because I just recently got sized properly in a bra. Given how slim you are, it's impossible that you should be wearing a 34 size band. I've recently moved from a 34D to a 30F and it just feels amazing now. You can get fitted at Nordstrom, it never hurts to try :-). If you measure your underbust very tight and it's close to 30 inches, then you should try that size, and the cup size goes up as you go down in the back size.
You can 100% breast feed after implants I know women who have. It's a myth that you cannot.
Great post! Im so happy you did this.. your right too many people are really narrow minded about it. I have no boobs at all. I wear a 34b but in reality im a 34 aa i just cant face buying it. I have always wanted the surgery but am a bit nervous. One day maybe.. but your post definitely made me feel like its something I could handle. I was scared the recovery would be brutal! xx
You look great and yours are very natural looking. Interesting entry! I also thought it was funny you went to the mall a day after your surgery I was like "of course she did!" LOL
Oh such a good post Veronika. I feel like an idiot but until I read this I didn't know you had implants?! Or at least I don't remember reading that. Anyway, good for you. I have long considered getting reductions, and I think I will in the next few years. To me it is no different that I want to make my boobs smaller and some girls want to make them bigger. We do it for the same reasons: clothes, self confidence, ourselves. Obviously some people go overboard (Heidie M anyone?) but for most people I know they got it because their boobs did not fit the rest of their body. Thanks again for sharing! xo
This post made me teary eyed. It helped me remember my feelings why I wanted to get a BA done.
I am also 5'10 and about 130 pounds so I too was a tall, skinny girl with tinnie tiny breasts. It was awful. I was very self conscious about it. I was so excited when I finally got my BA and like you said – 34 D doesn't even look that big on me. It's as if I was always mean't to be this size.
Nobody can ever tell that I have a BA. Even on days when I want to wear a push up bra, they just look amazing.
I support women that want to do surgeries that make them feel better and more confident and I hate that some people judge.
xoxo
-Natalia
Thanks for sharing your story. I always thought it was strange people would want larger breasts when I consider my large breasts such a burden but you carry them very well it seems. Now I understand a little better.
Your boob job looks great – I honestly had no idea until you posted about it. I actually went the other way & had a reduction. I am now a D cup but was disproportionally larger than I should have been.
Thanks for posting about it.
Kind of off topic, but I didn't know until this post that you have a PhD. Good for you! Love your blog, Verona. It's always a fun read.
Sarah I do not have a Phd I just did a postgrad program in public relations
I agree that this is a good and informative post for people who may be considering this surgery. I would just say in regards to the quote " Was I insecure about the size of my chest? Of course I was. But was I an insecure woman? Nope." that I do not see a difference in the two. By definition, doesn't having an insecurity mean you are insecure? I just think at the root of every plastic surgery is insecurity. You may not have been insecure about anything else related to yourself, but you were insecure about your breast size, so you technically were an insecure woman. Hopefully that makes sense, and I'm not trying to bash this post (because I think it truly is an informative and possibly helpful post). I just think we should call it like it is and admit that insecurities lead to plastic surgery. Or perhaps I am totally misunderstanding the distinction you were trying to make in this quote. I still love your blog though, I'm just confused as to how one can have an insecurity without being insecure.
I think you did a great thing by saying what you did.
I come from the opposite side of the spectrum having had my breasts reduced. Because of early childhood development, I was a 36JJ by the time I was fourteen. I did the same as you with clothes, except I hid behind mine. I wore several sports bras over top a regular bra in an attempt to minimize my bust. My girlfriends in school never understood why I would want them to be reduced. My reason's were like your's, personal. I never felt right with what I had, and it was starting to affect my health. Because I had such large breasts, and a smaller frame (I'm 5'4"), my spine couldn't support the weight and my spine started to form a curvature. I couldn't run, nor walk for long periods of time. which made exercising extremely painful and hard to do.
The point in my response is, never apologize for a decision you have made for yourself. It was the best decision I made, and I would do it again if I had to.
Thank you so much for being so open and honest and sharing your story. I have always been an A and unfortunately am now down to AA and this is something that my husband and I have discussed. So helpful to hear others stories.
@shelly—allow me to answer your comment. I think there is a VAST difference between having an insecurity and being insecure. I know that doesn't make sense, so I'll try to draw a picture here.
There is a huge difference between a woman who is so insecure that is prevents her from living her life—going out in public, dating, having friendships and relationships, etc. There are women who struggle with how they look so much, that they actually prevent themselves from living their lives…and a woman who has an insecurity but it doesn't cripple her. Some women struggle with body dismorphia and it cripples their entire lives because they feel like they'll never be good enough.
Then, there are women who don't like their nose or think they have fat thighs or think they need bigger boobs—but despite that insecurity, they live their lives and have healthy relationships and so on. Their insecurity doesn't cripple them or prevent them from accomplishing anything.
Every woman is "insecure." I don't know one woman who doesn't feel insecure about something. But what I'm saying is that there's a big difference between having an insecurity and being an insecure person.
I have been reading your blog for a long time and I think it is really great how you put this story out there. Not because you have to prove something (you don't) or to brag (you obviously aren't) but you are just being upfront and honest. Kudos lady 🙂
It was really well written and I'm glad that it has been received so positively thus far 🙂
@laura- thank you 🙂
I think it's important that I share my story because I know it's a topic a lot of women are sort of afraid to talk about. I think that as more intelligent and successful women speak out on this, the less of a stigma there will be.
Thank you so much for taking the time out to clarify what you meant so articulately! This is why I love your blog! I see that you are referring to the severity of the insecurity as being the distinction in this case. I really appreciate the clarification!
First, thank you so much for sharing your story. I know a lot of women are embarrassed to share some intimate details, but you made this very real and intimate (if that doesn't sound too odd).
I never knew that you had implants! It definitely looks 100% real, and your doctor did an amazing job.
A weird question…because you have implants, are you actually able to go braless if need be? I'm the same size naturally and there is just NO WAY in the world I'd ever be able to do it (I would even say that after having two children that probably helped speed up the annoyances with that). I've never been able to figure out how to wear backless tops, strapless dresses, etc. with a strapless bra correctly (I usually end up wearing a bra with the straps tucked in, yuck) and going braless is just not gonna happen. So I've always been curious about how women with implants deal with this.
Sorry for the ramble. 😉
Thanks for the post, I also have an augmentation and feel the same was as you do about not showing them off, but feeling great about being able to fill out clothing! I followed you over here from JBI a while ago and love reading your posts. 🙂
@shelly— i'm glad that made sense because i was totally starting to ramble!
@steph—I can go completely braless if I want to. Because I was so flat before, my breasts are very perky on their own (which is awesome). They had no sag before, so they don't have it now either.
I think with implants, the "size and shape" of your breasts is limited. What I mean by that is that natural breasts are composed of fatty tissue and thus they are "maneuverable" if that makes sense—basically you can squish them together, push them up etc—you can "redistribute" the fatty tissue according to the look you want. With implants (unless you had a lot of natural tissue before you got them) you are more limited because you can only work with the proportions of the implant. So basically when I wear a strapless bra, my breasts are perfectly contained in the cups and don't need to be "held up" because they are perky—like a shelf, though I hate to use that term. Whereas with real breasts, they do often need support and a bra that will shape them properly. I would go to a professional at a higher end bra salon and get fitted for a bra to wear for special occasions when you want to wear backless things or something strapless 🙂
Great post, Veronika! I think it's fantastic that someone out there is spreading the positives about surgery, and letting others know that there is more to everything than we realize.
Hey Veronika, I've been reading your blog lately and I saw your comment on Blonde in China's blog. I had no idea you don't have a relationship with your parents (well, because I just "met" you, of course!) I am going through a very similar thing — I feel like my relationship with my mother will never be the same. (I've been blogging about it a lot lately)I'll see if you've posted anything about it on your blog — I'd be interested in seeing how you cope with no relationship with your parents.
It's a strange feeling, to say the least.
@medcouple—I go to therapy about once a month. It really helps. Email me if you ever want to talk 🙂 veronabrit at gmail dot com.
Hi Veronika,
I had a breast reduction on only one breast when I was 19- I'm now 28. I had a severe difference in breast size due to extreme scoliosis (this disease can cause uneven breast size). One breast was a B cup, the other was a DD. It was a huge huge difference. It was so embarassing, and I had terrible self esteem until the day I had the surgery. I wouldn't go on dates. I didn't want boys to touch them, obviously, so I missed out on having high school relationships.
Kids were so nasty about it while I was developing (middle school years). They would cough "uneven" as I walked by, and just talk about how I was lopsided.
By the time I reached high school, I learned some tricks to hide the situation- expensive gel inserts that I would sew into one side of my bra each day. I was terrified that the padding I had to put it woud fall out so I always woke up early to sew pads into the bra I was going to wear for the day.
I believe it was hands down, the most difficult thing I had to deal with growing up. And this holds true even taking into account all the surgeries that I have had. It was just brutal to be teased about that, and I was so insecure.
My Mom and I are not close at all, and I didn't know how to aproach her about fixing the problem surgically. She was part of the problem. She would make fun of me, and tell me to always make sure to pad the one side because it was embarassing for her. But she didn't want to talk about fixing the issue permanently. It makes me so sad to think back to those days.
When I reached college, I decided to go ahead and get the reduction. I was of legal age, so I didn't need my Mothers approval.
I am now an EVEN full B cup, and could not be happier. I just wish I had done it sooner. I think I would have avoided a lot of heartache…
I still worry that I will gain weight, or my back will get worse, causing my breats to become uneven again.
I don't know what the purpose of writing this all out was. I just wanted to vent, I suppose! 🙂
Do comments not post until you approve them?
@claire—thanks for sharing yourr story, it was really moving to read it. I'm glad you're in a happy place now and you are definitely one of the people who deserved a surgery like this!
I've been reading for a while now and I never once thought you had implants so this post was a bit of a shock! But you're exactly right about the negative stereotype associated with implants or plastic surgery. I actually have a couple of tattoos which are small and I keep hidden because of the negative stereotype associated with them as well.
Great post. I hope that any girls that are considering breast implants but concerned about stereotypes associated with having them read this and are more confident in their decision.
I got breast implants in March 2009 and went from a 34A to a 34C (5'6 and 120, a very thin frame, so they are proportionate). I had always thought about getting implants since early high school but only started seriously considering it in 2003, after I graduated. I was pretty confident in my decision because I had spent 6 years researching it and finally found the right doctor (Dr. Ted Eisenberg in Philadelphia, double board certified) and the timing was opportune so I went for it. My husband didn't feel that they were necessary at first, but after going to the consult with me and discussing my insecurities about my small chest with him he was supportive of my decision. I remember the feeling when I booked the surgery, too – it WAS very surreal! And the excitement of waiting in preop and waking up in postop was a surreal feeling as well.
I have silicone gel implants as well, as I feel that they have a better presentation on someone with a thin frame. I don't think that I could have chosen a better doctor in my area because my breasts are incredibly natural looking. If it weren't for the thin, pink scars underneath the creases one probably wouldn't be able to tell that they are implants. It's indescribable how much they have boosted my confidence and allowed me to explore different fashions that I never would have before because now I can fill out clothing appropriately. I just wanted to share my similar experience/feelings 🙂
And PS – Good for you for not being ashamed or embarrassed about your augmented breasts. I am also one to proudly own up to the fact that I have implants – because, as corny as it sounds, having them has changed my life so dramatically by just increasing my confidence in myself. I don't think that anyone should ever been ashamed to admit that they have been proactive and improved themselves to boost their self confidence.
Diana—what a wonderful story you have, and thanks for sharing 🙂 I see we have a lot of similarities in our experience. I once heard a saying that sometimes a surgeon can fix something in 2 hours that a therpist couldn't fix in 20 years. As I mentioned in my post, I'd be a happy person with or without em', but it does feel incredible to finally feel balanced and "like myself" even moreso than before I had them.
This might be too personal, but I was wondering if it takes long for them to drop? One of the reasons I've never considered the procedure is that, as someone with very small breasts, there isn't any loose skin on my chest. I'm worried I'll wind up looking like I have balloons strapped to my chest for years while I wait on them to drop into a more natural tear drop shape. Did you have any issues with that?
Thanks for sharing this post!
@sarah–I'd say it took about 4-5 months for them to fully drop. Everyone's anatomy is different though and your results are based on both your unique anatomy and your surgeon's skill.
When i'm naked, they are very perky, but they do not look like ballons on my chest…but they don't necessarily look "real" either (though, I must say, I think most of the time implants have an even nice apperance than real breasts because they're so defined in shape—but that's just my opinion.)
Ultimately, the decision is yours, but I love my results and am so happy I had them done.
What an amazing post. As someone who has always been large chested (since the end of grade school anyway), I have never really understood why some of my friends decided to get implants. I kept thinking "you are so lovely, why?" and they couldn't ever really put it into words. This is the most amazing and cohesive explanation about opting for this surgery I have ever heard/read. I feel like I understand so much more now why this is an important life step for some women. Thank you for being so honest.
@MUG— I was really touched by your comment, thank you so much for taking the time to read this. I mentioned in my post that sometimes it's hard for women with breasts to understand…because oftentimes larger breasts can feel like a burden to some, but i'm glad my explanation helped sort of answer the question about why some women do it. 🙂
Um, I had no clue you have implants! I can see that I am not the only clueless one though, so that makes me feel less like a moron! I think that's great though, it's a testement to just how good and natural they look. Beautiful!
The negative stigma attached to BA is not so much the fact that a woman is "stupid" or starring in a porno so much as the fact that a woman is so unhappy with her body that she has to get one in the first place. I mean, you broke down and cried because you thought your breasts were disproportionate to your body. I think that women get BAs in the first place because of social pressures, maybe not directly placed by the men in their lives, but by those projected by the media. We expect women to have sizeable breasts and perfect bodies because that is what we see in ads, television, magazines, etc, so we exercise/diet, even excessively sometimes, and get breast augmentations when our bodies don't fit perfectly into that paradigm. While I respect a woman's decision to modify her body however she likes, I also highly respect women who can appreciate themselves au natural. So it's important that even while you defend your decision to have received this surgery, that you also encourage some of your female readers to appreciate themselves as they are. After all, if you have have a daughter some day, you want her to feel confident about herself.
@Tina—thanks for sharing your point of view. Unfortunately, there are a lot of cruel people in this world, and I did get made fun of for being flat chested. However that never affected me as much as simply my own feelings of feeling that my body was disproportionate.
I think it's admirable when women are happy with themselves just as they are. I think we should all strive to be that way. But I'm also not going to judge someone who has a really huge nose or a large birthmark not to have it fixed. I am certainly not comparing myself to someone born with a deformity of any kind, but when you never develop breast tissue and have the chest of a pre-pubescent child, you do feel like "something is missing" and it's not because of the media. That's just my expereince though/
I do appreciate your comment and for brinign a different perspecitive to this.
I can say with confidence that if my daughter one day did not develop breasts, I would support her, when she becomes an adult in having an augmentation (if she wanted one—of course I'd never push anything like that on anyone.)
sorry i meant to write I would NOT judge someone for having something fixed.
it was awesome of you to share this on your blog Veronika! i recall seeing many questions about it on your formspring, so now you at least have a thorough post people can reference if they're curious! i think your implants look incredibly natural, i would never have even guessed that they were Ds!
plastic surgery sounds so painful, i'm not sure if i would ever go under the knife, but i support anyone who does (well, except for maybe heidi montag!)
@kinsey— i think some procedures are more painful than others but I never experienced any pain (fortunately) with mine.
This was exactly what I needed to hear! Thanks for the post!
Wow, what a great story Veronica. It is hard to imagine that someone as beautiful as you would have insecurities, but it just shows everyone has something that bothers them. I really love your blog. I am curious if you would ever feel comfortable enough to put up before and after pictures so people could see the differences. I completely understand if not.
You definitely had an amazing surgeon – they really look natural and fit your body perfectly! You looked gorgeous on your wedding day!
This might seem like a strange question but do they make you talk to a therapist or anything before you book a surgery date? I'm not saying you would have needed it because you didn't have body image issues, but I know some people have plastic surgery for the wrong reasons… Please don't take that question the wrong way, I'm asking more in general about plastic surgery.
@jamie—I won't post the before and after photos because they are in bras and bikinis and I don't want to have that on my blog, even if they aren't of my face. Thanks for your comment 🙂 you're right—i don't think any woman is 100% without insecurities.
@lindsay—I was seeing a diff therapist at the time of my surgery for different reasons, but it was never discussed because I moved a month after my surgery.
I didn't feel the need to seek professional counsel because I had realistic expectations about my results and I never once questioned where or not I was doing it for the right reasons. In my mind I was just getting what I felt was always meant to be there.
Awesome post!
As a big breasted girl myself, I get very frustrated with the stigma surrounding breast enhancement but the total lack of it around breast reduction. I seriously have considered breast reduction and not for physical reasons- I have a strong core and it doesn't cause me back pain or hinder my life, I just think at times I'd look more proportionate with a smaller cup size. That being said, if I ever tell anyone I'm considering it (or if I got it done), pretty much everyone would be like "That's great!".. it just doesn't seem right that only one half of the coin gets the "go ahead" from a lot of judgmental people to get plastic surgery.
Something else I noticed in your post that I want to applaud you for is your very great remarks about how it's completely possible to have some insecurities but still be a secure and happy person in general. People like to get all preachy and judgmental but there isn't a person alive who has absolutely no insecurities and that doesn't make anyone a bad person!
I think the majority of people who get surgeries, no one would know. It's easy to get all sensationalist and pretend like just because some people use it to band-aid serious psychological issues or get addicted, then everyone does, but it's not the case. It is YOUR body and your right to change it however you want. Kudos for standing up for that right!
@anon—love what you wrote above! It's so true–most women who get surgery for something cosmetic aren't plastic-surgery obsessed like Heidi Montag who changed her entire face. Even Heidi is sad now that she did it. That's the price you pay for going too far though.
@ Tina-1:59:00 PM CST – You said, "…a woman is so unhappy with her body that she has to get one in the first place. I mean, you broke down and cried because you thought your breasts were disproportionate to your body. I think that women get BAs in the first place because of social pressures, maybe not directly placed by the men in their lives, but by those projected by the media."
That is absolutely what we see in the media. Shiny magazine spreads are held up as reasons why women feel inadequate. What the media does *not* showcase is how it feels to live in your body and it feel wrong or complete. Well, the transsexuals are getting their viewpoint expressed in that regard, but I have yet to see my body story told.
Can you imagine feeling like a piece of your body is missing? That's what it felt like to me. I felt like I was stuck at age 12 because that's when I stopped developing. I got two little nipple nubs and nothing else happened. I'm the only one in my family that was like that. My mom was a small A, but she had *some* breast tissue. I had nipples only, no tissue. It's easy to create illusions w/the different bras we have to choose from. However, it never erases the feeling that body parts are missing.
So as you hold respect for "women who can appreciate themselves au natural," just consider that some women completely appreciate themselves, but don't feel that their bodies are in their natural state and simply want to change that. It really can be that simple and not the deep seated, traumatic dramas that sell newspapers, generate web clicks and get tv viewers. Men's penises function just fine at various sizes, yet they seek to enlarge and lengthen them so they feel better about themselves. They don't get beat up in the media or beat up each other about it. My hope is that women stop criticizing each other for our choices and respect that we're different. And although we can't relate to why someone chooses to do something, we can be completely ok w/her choice.
@anon—WOW! you said in your comment everything I've ever felt about this. Thank you for being so articulate and for drawing attention to the real story and experience many women go through.
I seriously would have NEVER guessed that you had implants! They look so natural and definitely fit your body well. I have been thinking about a breast augmentation for a few years now. I'm 5'10 too and have never really had breasts. Just little ones. It doesn't seem to look right on me. Thank you so much for your story. It was very nice to read it. If you don't mind me asking, how much were they? I always hear such different prices that I never know what to believe.
@anon—mine were $6700 CND but I got a discount because my mom knows/works with the surgeon (at the same hospital)
I think it is absolutely wonderful that you've chosen to be so open an honest about something so personal. It will not only clear up misconceptions but hopefully give other women the go-ahead that they may need to improve their own lives. Good for you!
Dear Veronika,
You are a beautiful girl and your implants look great. I am a little saddened, however, that there is so much pressure in our society (I am not immune to it!) that cause women to undergo elective surgery which is painful and expensive. When I was in my mid-twenties (now 39), I also considered having breast surgery. I am very glad I didn't. After nursing my son, I have a very different view of my body. I do not regret my decision one bit. Just a thought for women out there debating.
@maria—my surgery actually was not painful, nor was my recovery. However, I know that's not the case for everyone.
Glad that you love the result because that is what really matter most. I'm on my early 20's and a mother of one child, after birth my body especially the breast part started to chance. Of course it was natural but still I'm dreaming to restore what I have lost. As of now I'm planning to undergo Breast Augmentation Los Angeles. I wish I could have such great results as yours.
This is a really late comment but I came across you on Guru Gossip and thought I'd read about your experience with breast augmentation. Though I want the opposite! I'm 5'2" and an E cup and I hate it.
I guess we're complete opposites, huh? 🙂 Anyways, I really liked your post and I'm glad that you're not ashamed that you got the surgery done.
I just read this post. I can understand wanting breast implants when your boobs are that small. I totally didn't know you had implants, I just thought they were natural. You look great btw. I heard you are supposed to get them replaced every 10-15 years though right?
Wow!! You have implants, but it's not noticeable at all, they look natural and great!
Now, I'm more decided to go for a Toronto breast augmentation procedure, because I have small breasts… the dresses and some blouses look horrible on me.
I can't wait and thanks for sharing your experience… I've found out some interesting things!
Thanks for sharing this article, its been a really interesting read. I've personally never dealt much with breast implants Toronto or learned much about them. I guess my sister needs to do it, I hope it all goes well.
I recently discovered your blog & came across this post this morning. THANK YOU for sharing your story, it was like I was reading my own breast augmentation story! 2 years ago (right after I turned 23) I had a breast augmentation. I remember being 16 years old and asking my mom if my boobs would ever grow (she said yes, but alas, they never did). Throughout high school & college I was happy and confident (even found a great boyfriend with my teeny boobies) but after I graduated, I spent time researching and scheduled my breast augmentation (SO. SURREAL.) I remember going in for my surgery thinking I would be really nervous, but I wasn't. I think it was because, like you said, I was getting something I felt like my body was supposed to have. My recovery was also pretty easy (I had my surgery 3 days before Christmas) and was able to celebrate with the fam just like any other year. I get a lot of "you don't seem like an insecure person!" when I tell people who I didn't know prior to my breast augmentation that I had this surgery. I'm not and wasn't an insecure person, which some people have a hard time wrapping their minds around. So thank you thank you thank you again for this post.
WOW. That was a ramble! 🙂
Thanks for leaving this comment! I'm also always confused when people think getting a BA means someone is insecure. Oh well! As long as people are happy with their choices, that's all that matters 🙂
This has been a great blog. Do you know where I could get a breast implant in Toronto? Thank you.
Good for you! I'm so glad that you actually went through with it and did it. I don't know if I'm that brave to have a surgery like this. I know it would probably pay off though.
Emily Merrell | https://www.drjamesfernau.com/breast-augmentation/
I have never heard about a breast augmentation from this perspective. You're right that most people make those kinds of judgements about women who have this procedure. Thanks for showing me a different perspective. I'm glad the procedure went well for you and that you were happy with the results.
Claudia Rosenburg | https://www.drjamesfernau.com/breast-augmentation/
P.S. You looked amazing on your wedding day!
Veronika, I found you doing a google search. I am a market research consultant and have been asked to conduct a research study with women who have gone through breast augmentation for cosmetic reasons (not reconstruction). I would ask you to participate in an hour long 1:1 call with me. In return you would be paid $100 Amazon gift card. If you are interested in participating please let me know. [email protected]
Thank you! And, I apologize for writing in your blog…
Hi! Thank you for this post. You don't know how much it means to me for someone to have had the same sentiments I have. I am 20 years old and have NO boobs at all. None. And I just felt robbed of something that I should have been experiencing of something that I should 'normally' have as a woman. But in reality, it's the truth. I dont have them. And reading your post, it affirmed my decision of having it done in the near future. Thank you and I hope you continue to live life to the fullest! dbc
I'm so glad that this post resonated with you 🙂
Wow you look amazing .Thanks for sharing
You look great after the “surgery”. And thankful by your post because it gives me inspiration and learning about your augmentation journey. Each and every woman deserves to be and feel feminine all the time, and for many women the shape and size of their breasts can make them feel that they lost their femininity. Thanks again for sharing.
The beginning of this post was seriously like I was writing it myself. I have finally scheduled my consultation for next month, after wanting implants for nearly 15 years. I’m getting married in 8 months and I am so excited to finally do this for myself. Like you, my soon to be husband is totally in love with the body I have now, but also understands and supports getting implants. We have been friends since we were kids, so he has known my desire to want more womanly curves, I’ve got the hips, butt and thighs but I am soooo flat – I wear those add 2 cup size bras to make dresses and such look decent on me.
This post has made me even more confident about my decision – I am so excited to finally do it!
Hey there Veronika! Kudos to you for such an evolved and open minded approach – we really wish more women saw things like you do. To be honest, the social stigma of plastic surgery is one of challenges we face at our practise in Chennai, India. I loved reading every word of your blog post and how it captures the essence of transformation you desired. It also is very comprehensive account for anyone considering the procedure themselves. Wish you the best!